Shedding Light in the Darkness

And Now for Something Completely Different

hedge1bzpR0VjV6PYmgR2QA topiarist in England has complained that drunks keep having sex with his ornate “privet lady” hedge. Designer and silversmith Keith Tyssen, 84, has been carefully cultivating the hedge in the shape of a Greek goddess for more than 30 years at his Sheffield home.

He has been woken up dozens of times in the middle of the night by drunk passers-by “interfering” with his creation. Mr Tyssen, who has exhibited his work at the Victoria & Albert Museum in London, told The Telegraph: “Drunk passers-by climb on top of her and pull apart her legs.

The hedge, which he named Gloria, started out life as a Greek male sculpture but was transformed over time into a “sexy goddess” he said.

Mr Tyseen trained at the Royal College of Art in the 1960s and was a contemporary of cutlery and metalwork designer David Mellor.

“If there are just a few leaves out of place she loses it,” he said. “I have to clip her very carefully every week. She needs a lot of attention. She possibly doesn’t get enough.”

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